The Toothless Minotaur

Assassins and a new warrior

Elf chillin’ at The Manticore Inn in Waterdeep. Met up wiht a Gruesome and bloodthirsty half-man named Hans Alag. Together they went on a mission for the noble family Ander of Waterdeep.

On the way towards “Vampire-Fang”, the hideout where the mission objective lies, 3 Gorgons stalked the elf + Hans! But they all died swiftly to Hans’ bloodthristy scythe and the elf’s piercing shots.

Finally, by one of the towers near Vampire Fang, Hans and the elf decided to roleplay as a wandering brothel! GASP Elf fails to assassinate a kobold named Garble, Hans 1-shots the guarding drow-spider.

Whilst exploring further, Hans insta-gibbs 2 more guards, laughin while their heads rolls on the ground.

Tried to cross the chasm that splits the towers, met a fire elemental, ran back, and Hans cleaved two guards in halves! Found out that the “master” was in contact with The Shadow Thieves. Explore further, got allied with green-blue giant.

Started fighting at the bridge against fire elemental, 12 gargoyles.

Hans had a deathwish, jumped off the bridge, swung with the rope with grappling hook that he threw at the same time and MADE IT!!

2 gargoyles gets smashed into rubble!

Hans cleaved down 3 more gargoyles in one single turn!!

Halfling appears, just to vanish the next round!

Elf bitch with greatsword appears, taunts Hans and bids up for an epic battle!

Our allied giant falls against a horde of undead! RIP Firegut :(

Hans killed Vargik (elf-bitch). Alven does a volley of death on the gnome Thyrok the Hobbit and turns him into a voodoo doll.

Hans and Alven then decides to run for it and leaves the tower/bridge after a successful loot/pillage!

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Into Undermountain

We are in the depths of UNDERMOUNTAIN!
In search of the bitch ArchWinter. On the way, KF use Find the Path and Windwalk to prevent us from getting lost in this Labyrinth of Certain Death!!

We find a city in the dark and humid cavesystem, inhabited by foul creatures! (Read: Orcs, Drows, Dwarves).

KF and Elf fights in the Pit to earn some $$ + so does DF.

DF meets a dude named “Sam” (tells her he has info regarding Archwinter!). Trades info vs escort to the surface.

Last battle in the Pit vs GALIAN THE MINOTAUR! KF gets gibbed and Elf surrenders w/ 2 HP!

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The Last Battle

Get supplies in Cormyr, letz kik sum Zentharim azz.

We find out we need to kill Sirrussus, a giant spider-like foe. Its poison take down Da Elf, but KF’s Slay Living !! Kills the beast. Easy as pie. DM angry :(

We fly into town, and shoot the sentries on top of the Old Skull. THey shout “Alarm!”. Let’s see what happens.

HOLY FUCKSHIT!!!!!!

We were raped by Alokkair, Zentharims and loads of heroes. EE is taken prisoner, the rest of us are in our sanctuary.

Let’s hope for the best.

In Shadowdale, after the battle
The four were seated around a dark table made of marble. Each of them represented the various factions that had fought for the control of Shadowdale. Two of the four were original members. The lich Alokkair and the drow priestess Aunrae Dhuurniv. The remaining members of the quad had to step up since the original representative for their faction had been killed earlier in the war.

“Every breath that creature takes is an insult to my House!” Aunrae pushed her chair away from the black marble table and started to pace around it.
“I say we bring him to Zenthil Keep for a public execution,” she heard someone suggest. The voice came from the Zentharim representative. A middle aged muscular soldier named Garrison, Aunrae didn’t like him. Then again, she didn’t like any of the surfacers in this alliance. The soldier continued: “I mean, we already have him chained to a wall, what danger is he to us?”.
“Just like a mortal to show such ignorance,” the icy voice of Alokkair the Lich cut through the air. “As your late High-Captain, you are about to make a fatal mistake. If it had not been for my help you Zenths would have had to bring news to Fzoul that Shadowdale had been lost.”

The forth member at the table finally spoke up: “I tend to agree with the Zentharim on this matter…” he cleared his throat when the drow priestess and the lich both turned their eyes towards him. “… at least partly. The wizard needs to be made an example of. With the latest victory in Shadowdale the resistance is all but gone, however the countryside is still teeming with freedom fighters. Perhaps if we displayed the head of the wizard the last hope of the rebels would be crushed.”

The others nodded.

“It’s decided then,” the lich said. “The wizard must die.”

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The Uprising

Drama in the washroom! We get info from woman, and we will KILL Drows!

We decided to loot a great big caravan. Epik fighting with kool wind rakes ridden by mages. The mages and the caravan have phat loot that the villagers will use to repel the invaders of Shadowdale. The strongest of the mages had on him EE’s SUPER RING and Alokkair’s bracelet (probably). We go into rown, and witness the beginning of a public execution. We have to stop it!We stop it! [illegible dwarven runes] The rebellion has started!

Meanwhile, in the Cormanthor forest not far from Misteldale….
She was momentarly blinded by the snow as she emerged from her tent. The guard standing just outside caught the movement of the tent flap and snapped to attention as his High Captain Darkhope emerged.

Darkhope gave a short nod to the saluting guard and started walking towards the tent of her officers. As the walked towards it she noticed several of the low ranking officers scurrying out of her way. Darkhope smiled in satisfaction, 10 years ago she had been hunting the same people on behalf of Tyr the Betrayer. Thankfully Fzoul Chembryl, the High Priest of the Zentharims, had been there to show her how she could redeem herself and seek vengeance on those who had abandoned her. In return for her loyalty to the Zentharims – the Black Network as it was sometimes called – she had been given the rank of High Captain and the title of Baroness.

Baroness Darkhope, she liked the sound of the name, she remembered with fondness how pleased she had been when she received that title. Her smile widened even further as she let her thoughts dwell on her current one – Viscountess. A title, Fzoul had promised, that would be escalated to Countess once her campaign on Shadowdale and Mistledale had been successful. The smile reached her ears.

Realizing that she was probably grinning like a fool, Darkhope checked herself before entering the tent. Inside it she saw Azailon, her First Captain, talk to some of the lieutenants. She also noticed that two of her personal bodyguards were present. They were devils, a gift from Fzoul. The two devils flanked a cloaked person, she didn’t recognize him and turned her attention to the First Captain.

“Report!” she demanded.
The officers snapped to attention and fists were slapped to the chain over their hearts.
“Lady, 50 more men joined our ranks since last morning, that brings the number of this camp up to over 800 strong, with more than a thousand of our men scattered among the other camps. This is not including our agents and cells who are still in hiding. Our scouts reports some elven activity in the periphery of our camp but are still keeping a good job feeding the tree-huggers misleading clues about our true numbers.”

Darkhope nodded, keeping more than a battalion men hidden from the watchful eyes of Mistledale’s scouts had been no easy task and she owed a great deal of the success to the scouts from the city of Shade.

“What about our garrison in Shadowdale?”. No answer came. “Well?!”. She pressed. The sudden silence from the big First Captain was uncharacteristic. She saw him shot a quick glance towards the person standing between the devils.
“Who is this man?”
“He is Mazilon, Lady High Captain, one of Eregul’s”, the First Captain stepped up to her side and handed her a small object, it was a ring, one that identified the stranger as a Skymage.

Of course, Eregul’s Skymages often wore magical disguises as a protection against assassination attempts, that was why she hadn’t recognized him. Why Eregul had sent one of his lessers perplexed, and on a deeper level, worried her.

“Well then, speak!”, she moved closer to the wizard as she sized him up, he looked nervous.
“L-la-Lady,” he stammered, “I regret to inform you that we ha-have run into s-s-some problems with the operation. The caravan we sent for after the destruction of the portal has – has been lost.”

Darkhope froze. Lost. As in ‘gone’? Who would dare? She felt her previous worry being replaced by anger. Without supplies the standing garrison would have to turn to looting and pillaging of the Dale. “What do you mean ‘lost’, wizard? When? Where? Who?!”
The Skymage was visibly shaken. “Just yesterday, at the crossroad north of the village proper. I am the only survivor, after I made my report to the First Captain in Shadowdale….”. He swallowed. “… a rebellion broke loose.”

A sword came clear of it’s scabbard. “WHAT?!!!!” The Skymage suddenly found himself with his back up against the two devils and his throat up against the sword of Darkhope. She let some of her inner magic seep into her voice. “Answer quick or I will flense your sorry hide and trap your soul between this world and the afterlife!”

“A rebellion Mistress…. the villagers revolted, they are lead by a band of adventures at least four strong. The… the Tower is under siege. Th….” His sentence was cut short as Darkhope drove her sword through his guts. She turned around to face her officers, her voice shaking with rage. “Assemble the army! We are returning to Shadowdale NOW!” She turned to her bodyguards. “Get the others, and get my steed, we are moving ahead to coordinate the defence until the main force arrive.” The two devils grinned and went on to the task. Darkhope turned around to the gasping Skymage, still impaled on her sword. “And you!,” the grabbed the hilt of her sword. “Your chance of redemption is still within your grasp, return to Shadowdale and notify Eregul that he is to assemble all the Skymages in the Twisted Tower. If you survive the wounds until the task is done I might still value you as useful.” The next words that came from the Skymage shocked the High Captain. “Mistress, the adventures…. they killed Eregul.” Darkhope shrieked as she spun around, the guts of the Skymage went flying into the air.

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Into the Lich's Gauntlet

Peeps present: E. Eplekjekk, KF, He + She-elf.

We are in a cave, outside Lich door. Dark. We open the door, and see an imaginary Beholder. We walk into a room where we found a woman (Dead) and her two bodyguards. We lure one of the bodyguards away from the woman, and kill him.

Elves open door to the Grinding Gulf, something happens. We find new guy, Nyx. Elf too. Moon elf.

We fight woman and remaining bodyguard. And then we go through lots of secret tunnels, and suddenly find an epic fight in a huge-ass cave. We kill the Metal Golem-cuntrolling woman with FIRE!

In the middle of the room, there is black orb of death magic which suppresses normal magic. Silvery-flame-woman-God kills black orb, and we see that during the fight, our “beloved” she-elf has fallen. Lots of epciness and XP for quest completion. Let’s kill a Lich. OK, let’s not kill it…. Negotiations end with us accepting a quest from him: Get a bracelet for the Lich, from a Zentharim (Eregul) within 10 days.

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Elves and ghosts

The elves run away from ghosts.

We turn around and kill them.

EE explored the next room and angered a golem.

Two assassins tried to kill us (Babau demons). We killed them after a hard fight. No loot :(

Found lots of secret doors.

Antimagic field is active here.

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Detour to Snake Land
Meanwhile, in another dimension...

Today is the birthday of Ka’Fan... we decided to chill at a local bar where we met a she-elf fighter (Phoenix Rising) and Abe the half-elf barbarian with the war cry. Abe gave us a quest to red a temple of an evil god. We keep both Loot and Temple if we suceed. Is a snake God btw.

Note to self: Mention Kåre-Leif the blacksmith in next important talk with important people.

We go to quest-giving magician’s house. Teleport to town full of Nagas (ok, only one, but still). And several yuan’ti. We fool the one that comes up to us, Diplomacy check at 34 easily persuades the sucka and we are told to wait in a house. Ka’Fan hatches a brilliant plan, lands on tha roof where slaves workers are held. Talks to people, get info, will try to save them some day….

We stroll into a fanged cave and upset a heap of bones and an elf. They die.

We crawl up a snake slide, find humans who rat out their snake masters. Valuable information!

Talk to lizard x3. Kill lizard x3 for treasure. Get key. Go back to though lizard man, who finds and amulet for us in a fountain. He proceeds to lead us to a treasure room where we plot to kill the high priests and stuff. Also, we get treshah!!1

We enter the room for which we need the key, where a dragon yells for help. We kill a woman who looks evil, but the dragon goes berserk. Ka’Fan Command it to hit the deck, and who can resist his charms? The dragon sits, and we beat it to -100 NLD with the flat sides of weapons, poor thing. Ka’Fan wants this one as a pet so we tie it up and keep it. KF will train it to becpme a magnificent beast!

We vandalize the place and slay our lizardman guide. Got tired of his slefishness. Portal madness soon followed. At some point we were in

K-19 (zomg!)

Crazy stuff….

Killed a whole prison, except for the prisoners. Went up some crazy stairs where the others dissapeared, but they came back. Loooooooong fight against the Avatar of the Snake God, and with a little miracle and a lot of meat bags we killed him. We saved the city, but we still have to kill the remaining of snake worshippers. KF will build tample to Tyr for his service. Gonna be a long summer for him…..

poor guy.

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One dark dungeon and a darker shadow

By Edgar Gone fishing! Got a big spider using priest bait. Flying Kick brings it down. DF kill three spiders, and scares the last.

By Edgar’s magic hand Sorry about the previous entries, I was drinking a LOT when I was writing, so my handwriting sucked.

Anyways, we are currently underground. We met some spiders and drows. They died. NP.

Found cave exit. Went outside. This turned out to be a “secret” entrance to the Shadowdark from the hill The Old Skull.

Found a spider-like foe, and we smoat his ruin upon the ground (that means we killed it like we d everyone else…). We r0×0r. It was a Fiendish Bebilith btw. Drain cave for water, walk to water-cave exit 5, find Batcave, walk back to exit 4. Go through hidden underwater passage and find a mummy, but it sees us and runs away. We split up.

TT and KF goes right, we (DF+EE) follow teh mummy, kill it, kill others. KILLING SPREE!!!

We met a crazy eye-meatball of destruction, but it was too phat to follow us into the tunnel, so we just left it in the dark.

We find a room full of undead, and a Banelar (cousin of Nagas). KF turns undead like Tyr himself, and kill 5 skeletons in a single holy round! He keeps on pwning n00bs. Turn undead has gr8 results. We win as usual. We free prisoners and brag a bit. We are awesome, prisoners agree. We evacuate the 180 prisoners past the Beholder. Only 2 casualties, Gabor 5 and 6. They will be forever remembered!

We go back to The Twisted Tower of Ashaba, “borrow” some uniforms and start operations: “Sneaky-Sneaky”. We find a nice kitchen dude, Peter Istvan, who shows us a secret way to the private chambers of the Lord of Shadowdale. We pretend to be brining him wine and cheese, and bonk him in the head. An evil spirit (shadow) escapes his body. We taunt him, hit him, 2x HADOUKEN and bitch goes down! Smuggle body out of castle on boat and bring Peter with us.

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Underground

Dwarf joined group – Tordek Thunderbolt! ACTION!!! Shadowdale!

Alvenkilling tough half-orc with fullplate and axe in surprise round.

Alven kills 5 Zentharims and 1 innocent villager. (EE hits one too, and expended a healing potion to bring him back)

11 dead Zentharims.

Old Skull inn Trouble – 12 Zentharims dead Escaping from 2nd patrol through secret tunnel in in which leads to the bottom of a crevice.

History time (see GM comment).

Fight shadow-spider. Elf rides the back of Edgar’s owl. Kills spider and feather fall saves the elf.

Meet drows. EE cast Fly on Dwarf.

DM called Edgar ‘tough’!

Elf kills all the drows, even steal the last kill from TT (dwarf).

Explore drow lair.

Find subterrain lake with twisted shadowstuff fang dragon that attacks from water. It also drains spells! Killed by the elf.

More drows, Fireball kills 5 676 drows. Dwarf is wounded in the process. Orb of Force takes care of the last drow.

Loot :D

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The Direct Approach

Present: EE, DF, Sszen, Alven

Sleep in new fortress

Defended fortress against invading Zenthish patrol, 13 kills.

Continue sleeping in said fortress.

Explore the Twisted Tower of Ashaba, go looking for ’’morning-grim’’ (Mourngrym, the Lord of Shadowdale).

We attack the tower Twisted Tower.

The bow of the ’’Alven’’ makes hurt.

Sszven butches level 1 people on top of tower.

Edgar Disintigrates the dragon (foulwing) of an enemy wizard.

The wizard was inpolite and counters Edgar’s Scorcherer. Divine Fury makes a flank attack on the wizard and brings him to the ground.

Sszven (a warmage) goes into a boxing match against a hardcore half-orc armed with fullplate and battleaxe. K.O in round 2.

Search/rescue/retrive mission to find Sszven’s body. Meet two balhannoths.

Mission failed!!!

TP‘ed to home sweet home.

Sell loot. 120K GP divided by 7.

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